Monday, February 07, 2005

Bloggin' In The Boys Room

I had a friend in college who told me that the key to writing a good paper was a good quote. All you had to do, he claimed, was find one good line, then write your paper around it. Well, I tried it a couple of times in a pinch, and got fairly good grades, so I figured it would probably work on this blog too. The problem is, I've had, "You got your chocolate in my peanut butter!" running around in my head for over an hour now, and... nothing. Seriously.

Ah well... Next time.

Let me take this chance to do a little bragging instead. I know, I know... I'm obviously not the type of guy to rub my good fortune in anyone's face... Not the type to find personal joy in knowing that I have something that someone else doesn't... Not one to spend an entire Saturday in my boxers eating Corn Flakes and watching Nickleodeon... Okay, well 2 out of 3 ain't bad. But let me go on record as having said,

"Na na n-na na! I get to see Motley Crue!"

That's right, baby! Red, White, and Crue! Oh yeah! Nothing like an 80's Metal Band to make a white boy wanna stand up and shout for his forgotten youth! Bring on the Levi's Super Slims! Break out the untied high-tops with the tongues hanging out! Hold that big, silver ghetto blaster high with pride, man!

Never mind that Vince Neil looks like he's wearing an XL body suit of himself... Or that Mick Mars' degenerative disease and recent hip replacement have him looking like one of Speilberg's worst animatronic nightmares... Sure, it may be almost 20 years since girls screamed over these guys (and any internet appearances by Mr. Tommy Lee don't count), but you just know they're gonna rip it up and get crazy come April! I can hardly wait!

Now, I guess it's only fair to give thanks to Rockstar, without whom this little journey into the past wouldn't even be happening. He may be a straight-laced, sales-driven, metrosexual man today, but there's a lot of long hair and hardrock guitar still lingering in his blood! He had his finger on the pulse of this concert announcement from the start and managed to get us all advance tickets! You rock, Rockstar!

I have to go now... I've have to get my girlfriend ready for this event. That means tons of hairspray, about a thousand bangles, and huge hoop earrings...

Look, honey! I'm buying you jewelry!
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